Weekly Comet

The Weekly Comet 55 (comments and criticisms welcome)

This edition is dedicated to #stuffmarkbowsersays, where they just keep getting funnier. As Mark would say at this point: "You don't negotiate with duct tape." We also apologize for the small print, we're having technical difficulties with the blog.

A Thankstrosity

As many of you know, last Thursday was the "day of the turkey" where most of the world spent the vast majority of the day making pumpkin pie and stuffing a flightless bird, it was thanksgiving!!!

Thanksgiving for us DeVylderes was much like the rest. We cooked the Turkey, the stuffing, the carrot salad, baked vegetables, and the apple crisp the night before, and the next morning we spent one hour testing Hannah, Grace, Rachel and Sarah, D., on the 6th grade BrainQuiz questions to see if they were, in fact, smarter than a 6th grader. That was followed by a mass potato peeling circle where we used almost all of our nine potato peelers and peeled 20 pounds of potatoes while listening to the story of George Washington Carver. When that was completed we went on a mile run while Hannah played inspirational music on her phone. All we had to make after that was the ham, salads, fruit salads, fruit punch, whip cream, and heat everything up again for Mom D. to take to Grandma Mary's and Grandpa John's house. After Mom left at 4:00 we split up the chores and did work between thrilling episodes of Psych so we were ready by the time people started coming. Once everyone was up to the table, everyone said what they were thankful for and, after the meal, there was nothing left to do except sit down, eat pumpkin pie, and watch "The Stupids." P.s: Don't knock it ti'll you try it.

Ezra's Birthday Bonanza

On the evening of the 25th, multiple Disney princesses along with a surplus of angry bird characters arrived at our house to celebrate Ezra's 8th year of age.

There were tons of suspicious looking characters including but not limited to Elsa and Anna from Frozen, Flynn Rider, Rapunzel, and Maximus all from Tangled, and the not-so-popular "Tan Man" and "Gray Guy" from who knows where.

Ezra had an amazing costume party complete with a game of "What's that Quote From?!" which Jewel D. was said to have dominated at, an all important chaotic mob, and cupcakes. (Ezra was also given a vast amount of Nerf fire-arms, which captured the attention of the U.S army.) Critics loved the party but were disappointed with the lack of guacamole

This is what the public had to say about the party in ten words or less, with the exception of Hannah:

Jerusha: "I'd say it was vicious, stampede, fire, angry, fire-arm."

Hannah: "If this relationship is going to work out between us I need to feel free to party with a bunch of strangers whenever I feel like it. I'll text you."

Dad: "Had great games, and a wonderful meal, and a really-"

Elijah: "Tengo un gato en mis pantalones!"

Anonymous tip: You can make cheese out of cashews.

Time to vote!!!

We encourage people to vote by posting a comment to the last edition saying yes or no on the measures. It would make our jobs a whole lot easier since at the moment we only have one comment. Do it right now to help the community!

Sports Update: Rachel and Grace D. dominated their try-outs with Rachel making Varsity as a sophomore and Grace making JV as a Freshman (wait for applause), their practices started a week and a half ago, and when interviewed they answered "es frio!"

In other news, Faith D. was so awesome that instead of settling for just plain A team or B team, she made it on an -A team with the awesome Dad D. as her coach, and their first practice is tonight.

Rumor column

Now, with 50% more detail!!!

There have been numerous sightings of Nerf-gun armed delinquents cavorting around the fire-station across the street. It has been said that the L.K.S is in-cahoots with said delinquents. They appear to be covering up the situation and when asked for a statement on the matter, they replied: "No comment," then added "Move along, nothing to see here."

Ezra's garage sale DID NOT open on his 8th birthday.

T'was the night before Christmas, and every creature was stirring, especially the L.K.S as they captured the famous "Santa Claus" and sent him to their secure underground facility. This season he's plotting his revenge.

#StuffMarkBowserSays

"We were discussing putting Mountain Dew in Eggnog" #stuffmarkbowsersays

"Lena was a lonely wildebeest, until we adopted her and raised her as our own." #StuffMarkBowserSays

"Now I know why there's no banana-flavored salsa." #StuffMarkBowserSays

"It's the most ab-usable instrument that exists." #stuffmarkbowsersays about cymbals.

"My tongue doesn't fit in my mouth anymore." #StuffMarkBowsersays

Babysitting...