The Weekly Comet 3 (comments and criticisms welcome)
Summer!!! It has now been a full week since school got out! Starting last Wednesday, kids have been going crazy with freedom from the school infested world that rules all winter, fall, and spring. Parents and teachers call it "education," (whatever THAT means.) And, since summer is only three months long, we kids at the DeVyldere academy try to make the best of it, including: flip & slides, tunnels, restaurants, and much, much, more! (as always, all we say in this news paper is prohibited from being used against us in a kid court of law.) Also, as we said in the last The Weekly Comet, the end of school means graduations. So since we had two graduations after the last edition, (*****'s on Thursday and Jerusha's on Saturday), we interviewed them afterwards: ***** says: "No comment." Jerusha says: "It was very long and hot, and in hindsight I should've worn shoes. But it was nice to say goodbye to OSU." II Graduation party To celebrate Hannah, Jerusha, and ***** graduating, we had one big party for all three of them. The party was on last Sunday, (also known as fathers day), so after church, the DeVyldere family raced home to have a fathers day lunch, and then started preparing the BBQ. Lots of people came, like enough that if we listed them by name you would get bored to death and just skip this part, so we won't go into that. But there were awesome DeVyldere ball (soccer with no rules) and DeVyldere volleyball (volley ball with no rules) games, mild concussions (dude, how'd you find out about that?) (inside joke), and smore making. It turned out to be a pretty good party. The polls Those words above mean one internationally known thing, the polls, (DeVyldere adoption polls.) We have this system of "adoption" that happens when a friend of someone older than 13 comes to our house two or more times. Everyone 13 or younger quizzes that person on their names, birthdays, knowledge of awesome movies,etc., and then they vote whether that person should or shouldn't be "adopted." If that person wins then they are officially adopted, like a sister or brother, (we really have a lot more . But the rules do not apply when that person is dating a family member, because you cannot date your brother or sister. (Luke sky walker moment The candidate running for adoption now, is Emily Smucker. Emily Smucker, has just graduated from LBCC, is a Mennonite, and used to work for the LBCC rival school newspaper. She has already played DeVyldere volleyball, DeVyldere ball, and can say all our names in order. Will she win? No one knows. The Movies Column New movies: 1. "The Life of a cat" by Blue Skies Productions. Tickets being sold next Wednesday. Premiere two weeks from today. New documentaries: None. New music videos: None, but the previous music video has been moved to next week. Anonymous tip: The DeVyleres got a new cat!! Working for DeVylderes. This summer, some DeVyldere's have chosen to get there hands dirty, (or cleaner if you count being a doctor, a Vacuum sales man (with an accent), a ninja ( in pink), or a hired, fired, hired, fired etc. intern at a news paper with a very pushy and t........ I mean sweet and caring best boss ever, (because this intern wants to keep here title hired, not fired), getting your hands clean.) Anyway, Micah D. currently works at OSU as a programmer, which is where he will be will be going to school this fall. Elijah has volunteered to act in a new filmed series called Gate Walkers, (as a mute guy. And is being filmed by John Brewer and produced by his company Bright swords productions) over the summer, and, he is also going to be working a little bit for Grandma D. too. Hannah and Sammi ( an adopted sister) are both still looking for jobs. And last but not least, Jerusha, who is working at the farm home in Corvallis. And she is currently covering for one of her coworkers who is taking some time off. We have realized that, due to technical difficulties, our facts may have been not exactly correct. So we apologize to Hannah D. for not getting the correct quote for you, and for not saying the right college that your are going to go to next fall, (by the way it is Lynn-field college), or the correct diploma. Weekly Chuck Norris joke: Chuck Norris once kicked a horse in the chin, it's descendants are now known as giraffes.
Rumor column The LKS is requesting stalker warrants for the easter bunny, Santa Claus, and the tooth fairy. The only reason the LKS is not taking the boogey man down is because he is Dad D.
